Family Work at Thanksgiving

I spend Thanksgiving with my Father who lives "Downeast".  I have discovered that he has been holding back on me!  He has an absolute treasure trove of family photos stored away in shoe-boxes.  Even though not everyone is labeled for quick identification, many are, and there were some I am seeing for the first time ever!  How exciting!  And even better, my Dad let me take a bunch home for scanning!  I have half scanned and labeled, and the other half is scanned, but not labeled yet.  Among the treasures my Father brought out at Thanksgiving were a number of architectural sketches and paintings from Scotland.  Not all are signed, but the two artists are most likely William Glashan and John Norrie.  I will be posting photos of them to this blog in a special section so maybe someone can help identify who did the unsigned ones.

Thanksgiving in New England

My Mayflower Relatives

It has come to my attention that some of the names are missing.  I will fix that as soon as I can!

I think any one of us living today can be thankful for our Pilgrim Relatives, the passengers of the first sail of the infamous Mayflower in Autumn of 1620.  After all, without them, we would not be here at all!

How many generations connect you with the original sailing of the Mayflower?  Below I will share my different connections.

George Soule

Heather Elizabeth Lindquist (me)

^

Vicki Ann Berry (my Mother)

^

Louise Grace Waltz (my Grandmother

^

Allison S. Waltz (my Great-Grandfather)

^

Alden J. Waltz

^

James W. Waltz

^

Eleanor Cushman

^

Apollos Cushman

^

Mary Soule

^

Joseph Soule

^

John Soule

^

George Soule*

John Tilley and His Wife, Joan Hurst Rogers and

John Howland and His Wife, Elizabeth Tilley

Me

^

Vicki Ann Berry (my Mother)

^

Louise Grace Waltz (my Grandmother)

^

Allison S. Waltz (my Great-Grandfather)

^

Alden J. Waltz

^

James W. Waltz

^

Eleanor Cushman

^

Apollos Cushman

^

Mary Soule

^

Joseph Soule

^

Ruth Howland

^

John Howland* and

Elizabeth Tilley

^

John Tilley* and

Joan Hurst Rogers*

Isaac Allerton and His Wife, Mary Norris

Me

^

Vicki Ann Berry (my Mother)

^

Louise Grace Waltz (my Grandmother)

^

Allison S. Waltz (my Great-Grandfather)

^

Alden J. Waltz

^

James W. Waltz

^

Eleanor Cushman

^

Apollos Cushmand

^

Joshua Cushman

^

Robert Cushman

^

Thomas Cushman, Jr.

^

Mary Allerton

^

Isaac Allerton, Sr.* and

Mary Norris*

Henry Samson

Me

^

Vicki Ann Berry (my Mother)

^

Ralph Allen Berry (my Grandfather)

^

Herbert Allen Berry (my Great-Grandfather)

^

Georgia Anna Demmons

^

George H. Demmons

^

Rufus Demmons

^

Gamaliel Demmons, Jr. 

^

Gamaliel Demmons, Sr.

^

Thomas Demmons

^

Elizabeth Oldham

^

Mercy Sprout

^

Elizabeth Samson

^

Henry Samson*

***********

Me

^

Vicki Ann Berry (my Mother)

^

Ralph Allen Berry (my Grandfather)

^

Herbert Allen Berry (my Great-Grandfather)

^

Capt. Ralph A. Berry

^

Clara Medora McIntire

^

Capt. Jeremiah McIntire

^

Mary Wallace

^

Rhoda Blethen

^

John Blethen

^

Hannah Sprout

^

Elizabeth Samson

^

Henry Samson*

William Brewster

Me

^

Vicki Ann Berry (my Mom)

^

Ralph Allen Berry (my Grandfather)

^

Herbert Allen Berry (my Great-Grandfather)

^

Capt. Ralph A. Berry

^

Charles Amon Berry

^

Mariah Cynthia Linnell

^

Allen Higgins Linnnell

^

Thomas Linnell

^

Mercy Mayo

^

Israel Mayo

^

Thomas Mayo

^

Hannah Prence

^

Patience Brewster

^

William Brewster*

**************

Me

^

Vicki Ann Berry (my Mother)

^

Ralph Allen Berry (my Grandfather)

^

Herbert Allen Berry (my Great-Grandfather)

^

Capt. Ralph A. Berry

^

Charles Amon Berry

^

Mariah Cynthia Linnell

^

Allen Higgins Linnell

^

Thomas Linnell, Jr.

^

Priscilla Rogers

^

Elizabeth Cole

^

Rebecca Mayo

^

Samuel Mayo

^

Hannah Prence

^

Patience Brewster

^

William Brewster*

Stephen Hopkins and Son, Giles Hopkins

Me

^

Vicki Ann Berry (my Mother)

^

Ralph Allen Berry (my Grandfather)

^

Herbert Allen Berry (my Great-Grandfather)

^

Capt. Ralph A. Berry

^

Charles Amon Berry

^

Mariah Cynthia Linnell

^

Allen Higgins Linnell

^

Thomas Linnell, Jr.

^

Priscilla Rogers

^

Elizabeth Cole

^

Rebecca Mayo

^

Ruth Hopkins

^

Giles Hopkins*

^

Stephen Hopkins*

Richard Warren

Me

^

Vicki Ann Berry (my Mother)

^

Louise  Grace Waltz (my Grandmother)

^

Allison S. Waltz (my Great-Grandfather)

^

Alden J. Waltz

^

James Waltz

^

Eleanor Cushman

^

Isaac Keen

^

Josiah Keen, Jr.

^

Abigail Little

^

Anna Warren

^

Richard Warren*

I believe I have a few more variations of connections, but this is what I have charted out right now.

The Mayflower Compact was a document of a list of rules and temporary government that was created and signed by the men on the Mayflower before heading ashore and settling.  Since the original destination was supposed to be Virginia, where there already were laws and a government, they would need something to keep the order in this secluded land on which they were about to settle.  To me, it is kind of like a Declaration of Independence.  You want your ancestors to have signed this important piece of paper.

Mr. John Carver William Bradford Mr. Edward Winslow Mr. William Brewster Mr. Isaac Allerton Capt. Myles Standish John Alden

Mr. Samuel Fuller Mr. Christopher Martin  Mr. William Mullins Mr. William White Mr. Richard Warren John Howland Mr. Stephen Hopkins

Edward Tilley John Tilley Francis Cooke Thomas Rogers Thomas Tinker John Rigsdale Edward Fuller

John Turner Francis Eaton James Chilton John Crackstone John Billington Moses Fletcher          John Goodman

Degory Priest Thomas Williams Gilbert Winslow Edmund Margeson       Peter Browne Richard Britteridge George Soule

Richard Clarke Richard Gardiner John Allerton Thomas English Edward Doty Edward Lester

The signing of the Mayflower Compact

My Photo Scrapbook... I hope it comes out okay

Click here to view this photo book larger

Turn your favorite photos into a photo book at Shutterfly.com.

I found AMARIL's Parents Today!

Amaril was supposedly born in Small Point (Phippsburg), Maine, in Sagadahoc County (but was part of Lincoln County back then) in June of 1819.  She married Jeremiah McIntire (Jr) who was a Captain, and they had and raised their family in Rockport, Maine (in Knox County).  That is where this cemetery is near Beauchamp Point.  It has been a big job trying to find out what Amaril's maiden name was, and then the biggest challenge was trying to find out who her parents were.  We actually made this trip to the cemetery to find George Demmons and his wife Leonice N. Grant.  Instead we found the mother-load for the Berry clan, and as we were still patting ourselves on the back for that, we walked around the corner and found the Demmons family and several Demmons family members.  This whole family must have just rented out this whole corner of the cemetery for them, because the only 2 stones not in this corner were from the Thomas part of the family, the stones of 2 infant children of John H. Thomas and Mercy H. Grant, my 5x grandparents.  The infants' stones were off the left side of the cemetery. We did not find the Thomas's (John and Mercy's) stones though.

Capt. Jeremiah McIntire & his wife, Amaril are buried in Rockport, Maine (Knox County)

THIS has got to be Amaril's father.  I know Amaril's maiden name was Wallace, but the Wallace family in the Phippsburg area is absolutely HUGE!  There were 2 children named similarly, but they weren't Amaril.  Amaril herself had a daughter named similarly.  (Research has her called Armorie Avesta). The photo of Amaril's mother's stone did not come out too well, but her name is Mary A. Would like to find out what HER maiden name is. 

Quite a large stone!  This stone is a beacon to the whole Berry corner of the cemetery.

NOT HER PARENTS---

So upon closer inspection I see the dated are from the same generation for all three stones.  Though Mary and Lyman are NOT her parents, Mary's maiden name is also Wallace.  It is believed that Mary A. Wallace (1828) is Amaril's sister, and that perhaps their parents are Josiah Wallace and Charlotte Wallace (same for married name).  Lyman's (born 15 Sep. 1822) parents are probably James Wallace and "Austrus" Sinclair.  I may never be able to confirm this connection since I am going by census records and names are often misspelled.  Look at poor Amaril... every census I found her on her name was spelled in a different variation, but it was obviously her based on the husband, location, birth dates and children listed.

I can look at discovering Lyman and Mary's stones as one step closer to finding Amaril's parents.

Update- Mary Wallace married Lyman Wallace, and Mary's maiden name is Wallace.  Mary is Amaril's sister!  THAT has helped me locate and identify Amaril's parents, in spite of all the misspellings of names in all the censuses.  Lyman's name isn't correct in any of them either!  So, it is official.  Without further ado, here are Amaril's parents!

Josiah Wallace (son of John Wallace and Hannah McIntire)
b. 17 December 1797
Small Point, Maine (Phippsburg/Georgetown)

d. 2 October 1879
Phippsburg, Maine (Georgetown)

Married 17 July 1817 in Phippsburg, Maine to:

Charlotte Wallace (daughter of William Wallace and Rhoda Blethen)
b. 26 April 1798
Georgetown, Maine

d.2 July 1898
probably in Georgetown/West Point, Maine

Yes, Josiah and Charlotte ARE related.  I think they are cousins.  No, Lyman and Mary are NOT (that I can find) related.

August 11, 2013- In My Family

On August 11, 1947 my mother was born in Camden, Maine to Ralph & Louise Berry of Camden.  They married in January of 1947... and no, my mother was not premature!  She was the first of 3 children.

For my Mother's birthday, my sisters, their families, and me and mine gathered at her home she shares with her husband David Henderson (my youngest sister is his daughter) on Megunticook River in Camden, Maine.  Fortunately it was a beautiful day and we ate Lobster rolls on a table outside on the lawn.  My dog got to play with my niece Fiona, down on the dock.  Rosie (the dog) dove after the ball Fiona threw over and over for her, would retrieve and bring it faithfully back to shore to be thrown again.  Nola, my youngest niece seems timid of Rosie this visit.  At Christmas, she was right there playing with her as we came into the door.  Not this trip!  I wish I could see them more.

The Girls- Back- Me, Erin, Nola, Kristen; Bottom- Rosie, Vicki and Fiona

The Party Table

Fiona on the swing

Fiona throwing a ball for Rosie to dive and retrieve.

Nola, getting so big at 4!

Nola and  "Bubby" shucking corn.

This loon made an appearance as well.  He came close so I could take some good pix.  I have a dog that totally doesn't notice wildlife, so she was still diving in while this loon swam around for a while, hunting for some supper.

In Arizona earlier that day, my Uncle David (Lindquist), my father's brother (the middle son), died after a long struggle with an illness similar to ALS.  All though this death was expected, my Father took it hard, which he didn't expect.

David Wallace Lindquist
b.  20 November 1942
Teaneck, New Jersey, USA
d.  11 August 2013
Arizona, USA

My Uncle David, sitting on  the far left with my Grandfather, Wallace
Anson Lindquist, and my Father, Eric, on his lap.

Uncle David was predeceased by his son and oldest child, Edward Lee Lindquist, who died 1 March 2013 in Wysox, PA when he was hit by a truck while riding on his Harley (he hadn't even had it a month).  He (Uncle David) is survived by his younger child, Elizabeth Lindquist, a wife, Joyce, an ex-wife, Sue Merritt, my father and his youngest brother, another brother (the oldest) Peter Anson Lindquist of New Mexico, 7 grandchildren and 1 great granddaughter (all by cousin Ed).

Uncle David was smart, athletic, and I remember how well his dogs were trained.  I remember thinking I want my dogs to be that well-trained.  Too bad he never met Rosie.  She is way smarter than those dogs!

William and Rhoda Wallace of Phippsburg, Maine -circa 1700s

The Wallace Family of Phippsburg, Maine 

(in Sagadahoc County)

William Wallace

b. 16 May 1753 in Phippsburg, Maine

d. 28 Feb.1846 in Phippsburg (West Point), Maine

Married: 29  Dec. 1778 in ?

to:

Rhoda Blethen

b. 7 June 1758 in Cape Elizabeth, Maine

d. 4 Dec. 1851 in Phippsburg (West Point), Maine

(Buried in a family cemetery on the property that used to belong to William Wallace, now called Holland Cemetery)

Children:

Mary Wallace *

b. 19 Sep. 1792 in Cape Elizabeth, Maine

d. 31 July 1878 in Camden, Maine

m. 29 May 1817 in Phippsburg, Maine 

to Jeremiah McIntire, Sr.*

James Wallace

b. 26 Oct. 1783 in Phippsburg, Maine

d. 7 July 1804, Lost at Sea

Levi Wallace

b. 20 Sep. 1784 in Phippsburg, Maine

d. 28 Dec. 1874 in Phippsburg, Maine

m. 1 Jul. 1810 in Phippsburg, Maine 

to Mary Mains

Zachariah Wallace

b. 24 Jun. 1787 in Phippsburg, Maine

d. 22 Aug. 1883 in Phippsburg (Sandy Cove), Maine

m. 26 Nov. 1811 in Phippsburg, Maine 

to ? Rachel Day (1790-1818)

Absolom Wallace

b. 30 Mar. 1789 in Phippsburg, Maine

d. 20 October 1875 in Phippsburg (Sebasco), Maine

m. 22 May 1817 in Phippsburg, Maine 

to Elizabeth Day (1796-1869)

Isaac Wallace

b. 1799 in Phippsburg, Maine

d.

m.

Rhoda Ann Wallace

b. 18 Jun. 1791 in Phippsburg, Maine

d. 10 Aug. 1878 in Phippsburg, Maine

m. 12 Oct. 1814 in Phippsburg, Maine

to McIntire Wallis (1795-1836)

Uriah Francis Wallace

b. 8 Jul. 1792 in Phippsburg, Maine

d. 6 Jul. 1864 in Phippsburg, Maine

m. 21 Sep. 1819 in Phippsburg, Maine

to Charlotte Wallis (1803-1882)

Jesse B. Wallace

b. 15 Sep. 1796 in Phippsburg, Maine

d. 14 May 1879 in Phippsburg, Maine

m. 20 Nov. 1816 in Phippsburg, Maine

to Hannah Gillian (1798-1889)

Charlotte Wallace

b. 28 Apr. 1798 in Phippsburg, Maine

d. 2 Jul. 1886 in Phippsburg, Maine

m. 17 Jul. 1817 in Phippsburg, Maine

to Josiah Wallis (1797-1879)

Miriam Wallace

b. 12 Apr. 1802 in Phippsburg, Maine

d. 1886 in Phippsburg (West Point), Maine

m. 10 Nov. 1819 in Phippsburg, Maine

to Isaac Wallis (1800-?)

William Wallace (III)

b. 2 June 1780 in Phippsburg, Maine

d. 19 Sep. 1832 in Phippsburg, Maine

m. 2 April 1804 in Phippsburg, Maine
to Eunice Mains (1783-1832)

Armerial Rachel Wallace 

b. 14 Feb. 1782 in Phippsburg, Maine

d. 14 Oct. 1871 in Phippsburg, Maine

m. 1st on 3 Jul. 1800 in Phippsburg, Maine 
to John Steven Lowell (1779-1815) He drown off Phippsburg.
m. 2nd on ?
to David Johnson (1780-1840)
^

Mayflower Passengers- Surnames- First Three Generations

Note from me:  I pasted this here from http://www.sail1620.org/mayflower-passenger-list.html because I have been tracing a family line back to the Mayflower and thought I'd check for the name that I came up with, and it is on the list!  He was a passenger!  As I looked at this list, I was amazed to recognize many surnames in my own tree, and nodding as I could remember what family it belonged to.  Amazing really.  I began tracking the Demmons part of my family back (goes to Oldham, Wetheral, and Sprout) and decided to find the misses parents.  I found their parents and their parents and... well you get the picture.  That family traveled all the way up to northern Maine (Downeast) from Massachusetts, and then back down to Rockport in the area where my family still resides.

*I highlighted in Bold text the surnames related to my family.

Anyway, if you are interested to see if any of your surnames are on here, take a look at this list.  Check out the site too.  One of my favorites.

Mayflower Passenger List

Am I a Mayflower Descendant? For those of you who are curious about whether or not you may be descended from a Mayflower passenger please see our List of Mayflower Passengers and Genealogies Links below. The surnames found in the first three generations after landing are also included. Mayflower Passenger List This page contains a complete passenger list for the Mayflower. It is based on the passenger list made by William Bradford in his contemporaneous journal which was published under the title Of Plimoth Plantation. Passengers are listed alphabetically by surname. Included under the names of the passengers are the surnames found in the first three generations after landing. Alden, John List of Names found in the first three generations of the Alden Line Paddock, Wheeler, Babcock, Staples, Cheesborough, Bumpas, Grinell, Seabury,Simmons, Southworth, Coe, Peckham, Bridgham, Delano, Drew, Bass,Thaye Allerton, Isaac Mary (Norris) Allerton, wife Bartholomew Allerton, son Remember Allerton, daughter Mary Allerton, daughter List of Names found in the first three generations of the Allerton Line Cushman, Waterman, Pratt, Sturtevant, Vaughn, Hawkes, Tuttle, Phelps Allerton, John Billington, John Eleanor Billington, wife John Billington, son Francis Billington, son List of Names found in the first three generations of the Billington Line Washburn, Sabin Bradford, William Dorothy (May) Bradford, wife List of Names found in the first three generations of the Bradford Line Fales, Fitch, Stebbins, Faunce, Bingham, Webb, Hathaway, Hedge, Churchill Brewster, William Mary Brewster, wife Love Brewster, son Wrestling Brewster, son List of Names found in the first three generations of the Brewster Line Safford, Wetherell, Turner, Silvester, Coit, Coffin, Barrell, Stockbridge, Gould, Loud, Stetson, Mayo, Freeman, Bowman, Hinkley, Higgins Britteridge, Richard Browne, Peter List of Names found in the first three generations of the Browne Line Tinkham, Shaw, Snow Butten, William Carter, Robert Carver, John Katherine (Leggett)(White) Carver, wife Chilton, James Susanna (Furner?) Chilton, wife Mary Chilton, daughter List of Names found in the first three generations of the Chilton Line Safford, Wetherell, Turner, Silvester, Coit, Coffin, Barrell, Stockbridge, Gould, Loud, Stetson, Mayo, Freeman, Bowman, Hinkley, Higgins, Hathaway, Hedge, Churchill Clarke, Richard Cooke, Francis John Cooke, son List of Names found in the first three generations of the Cooke Line Mahieu, Wright, Gifford, Faunce, Mitchell, Washburn, Hayward, Wilcox, Earle, Mosher, Peckham, White, Hathaway, Tompson, Swift, Reed, Tabor Cooper, Humility Crackstone, John John Crackstone, son Doty, Edward List of Names found in the first three generations of the Doty Line Sherman, Oakman, Hatch, Turner Eaton, Francis Sarah Eaton, wife Samuel Eaton, son List of Names found in the first three generations of the Eaton Line Canedy, Ramsdell English, Thomas Fletcher, Moses Fuller, Edward Mrs. Edward Fuller, wife Samuel Fuller, son Fuller, Samuel List of Names found in the first three generations of the Samuel Fuller Line Wood, Holmes, Bozworth Gardinar, Richard Goodman, John Holbeck, William Hopkins, Stephen Elizabeth (Fisher) Hopkins, wife Giles Hopkins, son by first marriage Constance Hopkins, daughter by first marriage Damaris Hopkins, daughter Oceanus Hopkins, born en route List of Names found in the first three generations of the Hopkins Line Snow, Nickerson, Coan, Paine, Knowles, Cobb, Cole, Walker, King, Ring, Merrick, Cook, Godfrey, Smith Hooke, John Howland, John List of Names found in the first three generations of the Howland Line Gorham, Hawes, Bacon, Lovell, Sturgis, Davis, Dimock, Thacher, Baxter, Gibbs, Dickinson, Bozworth, Bourne, Huckens, Chipman, Eldredge, Crocker, Wood, Davis, Bursley, Lothrop, Hacket, Hinckley, Conant, Brown, Medbury, Carpenter Langmore, John Latham, William Leister, Edward Margesson, Edmund Martin, Christopher Mary (Prower) Martin, wife Minter, Desire More, Ellen Jasper More, brother Richard More, brother Mary More, sister List of Names found in the first three generations of the More Line Knowlton Mullins, William Alice Mullins, wife Priscilla Mullins, daughter Joseph Mullins, son Priest, Degory List of Names found in the first three generations of the Priest Line Pratt, Wright, Swan, Perry, Combs, Barrows, Bennet Prower, Solomon Rigdale, John Alice Rigdale, wife Rogers, Thomas Joseph Rogers, son List of Names found in the first three generations of the Rogers Line Richmond, Walker, Terry, Macomber, Williams, Higgins, Phinney, Linnell, Harding Samson, Henry List of Names found in the first three generations of the Samson Line Bonney, Ramsdell, Sprout, Oldham, Tilden, Holmes Soule, George List of Names found in the first three generations of the Soule Line Simmons, Weston, Darling, Peterson, Haskell, West, Standish, Myles Rose Standish, wife List of Names found in the first three generations of the Standish Line Gushee, Delano, Hobart, Hatch, Samson Story, Elias Thompson, Edward Tilley, Edward Ann (Cooper) Tilley, wife Tilley, John Joan (Hurst)(Rogers) Tilley, wife Elizabeth Tilley, daughter Tinker, Thomas Mrs. Thomas Tinker, wife boy Tinker, son Trevore, William Turner, John boy Turner, son boy Turner, son Warren, Richard List of Names found in the first three generations of the Warren Line Ford, Branch, Churchill, Snow, Winslow, Waterman, Little, Keen, Partridge, Gray, Otis, Avery, Tilden, Palmer, Lincoln, Thaxter, Dunbar, Church, Cox, Boomer, Smith, Phinney, Lucas, Bartlett, Sprague, Barnes, Faunce, Morey, Harlow, Rider, Green, Delano, Burgess, Jenney White, William Susanna White, wife Peregrine White, son Resolved White, son List of Names found in the first three generations of the White Line Gardner, Young Wilder, Roger Williams, Thomas Winslow, Edward Elizabeth (Barker) Winslow, wife Winslow, Gilbert Mr. Ely unnamed maidservant of John Carver

Great Works, Penobscot Co., Maine--- circa 1870 -George H. Demmons Relocates from Washington County, Maine to Penobscot County, Maine

Leonice N. Grant, b. 8 Apr. 1857 in Bradley, Penobscot Co., Maine Married George H. Demmons, b. Nov. 1840 in Marion or Whiting, Washington Co., Maine on 18 Jan. 1874 in Bangor, Maine. They gave birth to all of their babies in Bradley Villiage(Great Works), and the Old Town area, but it seems that they all moved to the Rockport, Knox Co., Maine area where many of them would live their lives, marry, raise families themselves and die. The patriarch, George H. Demmons, was a Mayflower descendant, and like many of them, they worked their way up the coast generation after generation, finding new places along the way.

 One problem we genealogists may have today when searching out family members from days long past is now non-existent towns, renamed towns, even towns that have turned to lakes! Great Works, Maine does not exist anymore. It did not take me too long to find out where it was, because there is still a town there. Bradley, Penobscot Co., Maine is up the river from where I presently live in Bangor. There are 3 towns and a bridge between me and this town. I am eager to learn a little bit about this area to see what the big attraction was for George to relocate from Washington County, as it is not a short trip even today.

 I found a site with an old map of Bradley Village or Great Works, Maine and thought I'd share it with you!  Zoom in and out to find the right map.

  

Gift From Heaven

I can only speak from the mother's point of view, but one of the most painful things that can happen the death of a child.  Whether the child is 30 years or 30 weeks gestation, the loss is felt with all your heart and soul.  For me, a miscarriage at the end of the first trimester felt like my body had rejected my own child.  I know, maybe that sounds silly considering that at the time, they were all one, but that is how I felt.  Even in a brief time, I had built up hopes and dreams for this child.  The baby had a name.  A life grew inside of me.  It was all such a miracle.  I even started a journal at the suggestion of a friend of mine who gave one to me for a Christmas present.

My baby, 9 wk. ultrasound, Mattea Soleil.  Mattea was with God by January 3, 1995.

One of the difficult parts of doing family history is hunting for all the lost babies and children.  Especially the babies, because if they died in early infancy, often they were never mentioned.  Maybe there would be a tiny tombstone that would be in the family plot.  Some are adoringly decorated with lambs, angels and cherubs, flowers, and the dates of a very short life.  Back a hundred or so years ago contagious diseases would whipe out households, and even communities (like small pox epidemics, Scarlet Fever, Polio).  In a graveyard you would see whole families that died off one by one in fairly close succession.  It was something that unfortunately was very common.  Some families would name their next child with the same name of the child that died young, which makes for some confusing family research work.  I don't think I could have ever done something like that, but many did.

The Norrie Twins

One of my cousin's (from the Waltz side, my great x3 grandfather's brothers' 3x grandchild, or something like that) wife had a miscarriage on early Monday morning.  She was 13 weeks along.  My cousin and his wife are very distraught, which is to me very understandable.  On his Facebook Page I typed something like "I sooo know what you're going through" which sounds trivial, but for the simple fact that I do know what it feels like to lose a baby at that point in gestation.  I truly hope they understand that I did not write that on a whim.  My cousin stated he'd never hurt so much before.  I know, from the mother's point of view, what that pain is like, and it is deeply felt.

About 12 weeks gestation

They will have a funeral on Thursday for the baby.  I am a little jealous of that as I did not have a body

to view or hold or bury.  My body did not "abort" the baby.  I had to have it removed.  It was quite traumatizing, though at the time I tried to keep a tough front.  I suspect that having a funeral will provide the family with some sort of an end that I may never feel.  They will have a stone to memorialize their dear baby boy.  (Yeah, I'm jealous).  It will not soothe the loss but help them to grieve.  A stone, maybe could symbolize "Yes, I was a real baby you lost."  They will have a place to lay flowers or teddy bears.

Babies are a gift from God

Children choose us before they are born.  They are excited to become our children and provide us with love and lessons and grace.  Even the child that is never born from a womb has a purpose and has completed his journey.  Something became of that journey.  I will never know what Mattea's purpose is til death, but she left an indelible mark on my heart and in my life.  One day I hope that I will be able to meet my baby lost so many years ago.  I hope I am good enough for that.

My cousin and his wife have been blessed with 3 children already.  They do not know it now perhaps, but this fourth baby was a blessing as well.  I have to say that I envy them there too, to have 3 children.  I have none.  I wanted a few, but it just never happened.  I was supposed to be a mother.  It is just in me.  I grew up never thinking that I wouldn't become a mother.  I don't know if I will ever feel like my life was complete because I will have never been a mother to a live child.  Never have that chance to try my hand in parenthood.  Maybe it is for the best.

Little me, ready to be a mommy.  What a big job!

I know that my cousin and his wife probably don't feel super blessed right now.  It is going to take some time for the pain of this loss to lessen.  I pray that his family will find peace with each other during this time for them to mourn.

And they will never forget their son.  He will always be their son, their sweet little angel that never had a chance to join his siblings here on Earth, but they will meet one day.  May they find peace in that.

In memory of Josiah Michael, with God by June 10, 2013